Why Disliking Learning Languages Is Not A Good Thing

I learnt French at school but I hated the subject so much that I vowed when I left school I’d never speak it or any other language (other than English) again. I’m 58 and to this day I’ve kept m vow. I did care out a time/benefit analysis on learning another language recently and it just proved that the benefits of learning another was not worth the required to do so.

I din not enjoy in any aspect learning my native language. I am in the process of squirting (Mexican) spanish. We retired and live in Mexico. Any honest person, will readily and respectfully agree, that spanish is the most disgusting, slimy, slack jaw, ugly sounding, offensive rapid fire in your face, offensive sounding language. But, I am consistently day by day aquiring this toung to assimilate into the culture. I discuss myself when I speak it. No matter how slow I speak it. My pronunciation is beautiful, so all the locals tell me. They say I have no american accent at all. I totally dislike the process, and the language, but I will become fluent as I did my native tounge. Like Japanese, it is a pure, in every sense of the word, horrible sound. So, it is possible to learn a language that is ugly, and also disliking the process just as promptly as a person that likes it, and enjoys learning. Necessity is the key, not liking it. Thanks

Hi, I find your post very interesting. I agree with all your points but think it’s really hard for some people.
Personally, I love the concept of language learning, I love learning interesting things like the Arabic word for crazy, above. But honestly, I do hate the process of learning. Why? Not because I only see it as a means to an end because I don’t. I’m learning Russian right now because I want to, not because I have to and I love the language but every moment I’m learning I feel constantly frustrated. I’ve never felt so useless, upset or down on myself as I do in language lessons. My heart rate accelerates, my face flushes red. I feel insecure around other students and an uncontrollable anger overcomes me. I don’t know why I have such a visceral reaction, it’s unlike anything else. But because of this I truly do despise the learning process.
Sometimes I’ll surprise myself and say or understand something I didn’t know I could and that feels great, but these are very rare moments.
I agree with you, do what you like, but when even looking at a page of text is daunting, or the audio track on a tv show is meaningless to you, it’s really hard to be motivated.
I really wish I did love it, but as much as I try, I hate hate hate it.
Does anyone else feel like this? How can a person who has motivation but hates the process come to terms with that?

I am late with this but I’ll leave it for posterity.

Language IS only a means to an end.

Society has progressed because of what we have built not because of what we have written. Imagine this... would society be better off if someone writes about a cure for cancer, or if somebody puts it into actual practice.

The written word may help convey ideas, but until they exist in the physical world it is mere words. People aren’t nomads just searching for conversations with others, people are action.

If I am in a foreign country and need to use a bathroom, I don’t care about the culture, pronunciation, nor being fluent... I merely want an answer in the most expeditious manner.

I partly agree with you.

But I also stand by the indisputable fact that the best language learners are the ones who love the process of learning languages.

For you, getting your point across that you need a toilet is all that matters - for people like myself, we aren’t satisfied with just getting our point across. We want to know how native speakers ask where the toilet is and imitate it as much as possible.

I’m interested in your article on the concept of learning.
It’s really inspired me this learning method.

Only learning for learning.......(Thanks.)

Far from being in the illustrious crowd of multiple language learners, I’m just doin’ my best to learn Thai.

Now if I’d put some forethought into acquiring a second language (after my mother tongue; American English), perhaps I’da picked one written in something resembling engrish, like Spanish. I probably wouldn’t have picked one which has 44 consonants, 32 vowels, 4 tone marks or one which contains 6-“T’s”, 5 “K’s” and 4-“S’s”.

Be that as it may, it’s been an interesting experience, and certainly made me appreciate being a native English speaker. Thai is far less difficult that English. Learning Thai has shown me just how hard English can be for non-native speakers to become proficient in, as it seems English has more exceptions to the rules than things which follow them.

To some degree, my learning Thai has been a means to an end for me. I live in Thailand, surrounded by the ever smiling, yet diminutive Thais day in - day out. It was less than fruitful trying to compel them to speak English, and even converting a Thai at a time to English, I had a long road ahead with 63+ million of ‘em here.

I learned Thai so I could accomplish things I wanted to do with the least possible use of charades, mime or stick figure drawings. It wasn’t all that fun early on, however when my language learning hit a “critical mass” or “tipping point”, suddenly my knowledge increased exponentially in relation to the time I was investing.. Honestly don’t know how useful a language Thai is on the world stage, in fact I’d say it’s a pretty darned low on the list if you ain’t here, where it seems most of the Thais congregate (this being Thai-Land and all).

At least now the “noise” which before sounded like a swarm of angry bees buzzing around me filters into my head as actual conversations, and I can interact with these people. It has turned a fairly isolated existence here into a real enjoyable experience, as well as given me a new “hobby”; the Thai language.

I enjoy reading this blog, as it always has useful tid-bits of stuff I can apply to Thai.

I think we can all have our own goals and reasons for learning languages. Really it is up to each individual.

I have no doubt that for many and perhaps most people, the study of a language is just a means to and end. Immigrants need the language. Company employees, who can get a bonus or a better assignment if they know a language, especially English, are probably not in love with the process. I have no trouble with that.

Some people study languages just in order to have a basic level of communication with the locals on their next vacation, at least to be able to say “please” and “thank you.”

I enjoy language learning, but I may be, along with Donovan here, and exception. I have been learning Russian these last few years, and recently started on Czech. I have no need for these languages. I derive immense enjoyment from reading books, following radio, watching movies etc. in these languages. When I was in Russia I was in seventh heaven, using the language as much as possible. I plan to do the same in Prague in October. That will be my reward, but in the meantime, like you Donovan, I enjoy the process.

I think that those who enjoy the process are prepared to put in more time, and for that reason and a few other reasons, they usually learn better.

I personally love learning languages. I can’t get enough of the process. Even so, I fail to see why it is a bad thing to hate the process but love the end result. We all do this at various times in our lives. Some of us hate our jobs, but we enjoy the money and security obtained from them. Some of us hate cooking food every night but we love the taste of a nice home-cooked meal when we sit down to eat. Some of us hate long airplane or car rides, but once we hit our destination, we’re in heaven. Not everyone is going to enjoy the things we like; not everyone is going to have a passion for every subject. That doesn’t mean they are less knowledgeable, less sincere, or a less trustworthy teacher. This whole post seems to be an ad hominem attack, and I don’t agree with it. He ought to be judged on the basis of what he brings to the table, not whether or not he has passion for the subject. His passion is irrelevant.

I think that it is probably more noble to do what the guy you’re talking about is doing, anyway. He dislikes learning languages but does it anyway just to communicate with people in their native tongues. I think that’s cool and that is something to be praised in itself. I don’t think anyone really has any grounds to call him out on it. He could just as easily be like my brother, who hates language learning and expects foreign people to speak English to him when he travels. Tell me again why making the effort is a bad thing, just because one lacks the passion for the technical aspects of language learning? It seems like a terribly pointless criticism to me. And it just seems so... juvenile... so snobby. I can’t endorse that.

Alt maith. Though just to let you know that there are tens of thousands of Irish speakers on the east coast of Ireland too and Gaeilge is a community language for many people in the big cities like Baile Átha Cliath and Béal Feirste. Seans go bhfaighfidh tú amach lá éigin... Ádh mór ort!

Agreed - Irish is a real language - I met someone (a Russian!!) who speaks it here in Taipei!!! Suggesting that it’s useful only for those with linguistic curiosity is a very sad thing indeed - it’s a means to make some wonderful friends in many places outside the Gaeltacht if you know how to find them.

One quick solution I’ll tell people is to search meetup.com for Irish since a small handful of cities in America have Irish language meetups. Also, Couchsurfing lets you search per language to invite an open minded person in the same city out for coffee, and I have been able to meet up and chat as Gaeilge thanks to this feature!

I also see Irish as “just a means to an end”, but that end is a wonderful exchange with another human being ;) This is precisely how Irish should be viewed if it’s to continue to grow. If only linguists were interested in it then it would die out. Instead people like me have used it to “chat up girls” and other such natural things that a language truly exists for.

Go raibh maith agat :)
I know that there are Irish speakers in other parts of Ireland too. I say west coast because in all probability I’ll end up heading back to Kerry soon. Thanks for commenting :)

At first I was like, I didnt hear about this. Who said that “it is only a means to an end”. I seriously thought it was someone of a serious nature. I foundly found the link to the page you were talking about and of course who else is but the Benny The Polyglot.

This is probrably why I didnt hear of it, I view his stuff in low quantities, after I established the fact that he is spammy and a bit attention-seeking. Personally, I feel what he says offers nothing to me as a serious language learner. He is not someone I’d want to emulate when it comes to language acquisition beyond basic speech. In fact, I imagine he walks around like many of these migrants that come to this country and have errors upon errors in communication and are rather dull to converse with past a certain point.

Still there in reality I find no issues with his weak goals in language acquisition. The only issue I have is his usage of the loose term fluency to other learners, especially as he’s been espousing more and more that he disregards so much of a language that in noway can he be fluent (as he is fluent in English).

Anyway besides that I found this post great and reinforcing for those true language lovers out there who actually strive for a deeper level of communication. I especially love that ‘jinn” example. You should do a post about idioms that give a glimpse into cultures. That’d be interesting.

Thanks! Will do.

I think in Benny’s context, I can understand why he’d say it. He has a limited amount of time in each place he chooses to be (three months at most - has he spent longer that that anywhere?) And he tends to go to places where the languages have no similarities to any language he speaks. With no linguistic frame of reference and the time constraint, I’d probably hate the learning process too if I had those limits place on me.

It must be frustrating to spend the first 2 1/2 months stammering along, finally get a few “A-ha!” moments in the last two weeks, only to have to move on.

But I’ve never been a fan of placing time constraints on learning a language. Certainly, goals are one thing and they’re helpful to have, but the whole “I’m going to be fluent in X amount of time” is just too nebulous and prone to failure.

Benny’s made a point of repeatedly mentioning that Mandarin is going to be a language that he will speak “for life”, which is something he’s not said about any other language in his recent language-learning history (except maybe ASL?)

It’ll be more interesting to see how he handles his continued learning of the language once he leaves Taiwan. He may learn to like the process then. Then again, he may just leave it altogether. Who knows.

I think in Benny’s context, I can understand why he’d say it. He has a limited a
mount of time in each place he chooses to be (three months at most - has he spen
t longer that that anywhere?) And he tends to go to places where the languages h
ave no similarities to any language he speaks. With no linguistic frame of refer
ence and the time constraint, I’d probably hate the learning process too if I ha
d those limits place on me.

It must be frustrating to spend the first 2 1/2 months stammering along, finally
get a few “A-ha!” moments in the last two weeks, only to have to move on.

But I’ve never been a fan of placing time constraints on learning a language. Ce
rtainly, goals are one thing and they’re helpful to have, but the whole “I’m goi
ng to be fluent in X amount of time” is just too nebulous and prone to failure.

Benny’s made a point of repeatedly mentioning that Mandarin is going to be a lan
guage that he will speak “for life”, which is something he’s not said about any
other language in his recent language-learning history (except maybe ASL?)

It’ll be more interesting to see how he handles his continued learning of the la
nguage once he leaves Taiwan. He may learn to like the process then. Then again,
he may just leave it altogether. Who knows.

Eh, I don’t really believe Benny “dislikes” learning languages or he wouldn’t spend so much time on it; I do believe he’s not interested in the nuts-and-bolts stuff that you and some of the others are into. I like knowing quirky stuff, like what you mention about etymology, but I’m not at all interested in fundamentals of grammar or diphthongs or gutturals. I also don’t care TOO much about speaking super-correctly, as long as people can understand me without it being too annoying to bother. There are times when I enjoy the language-learning activities I do and times when it seems really dull. It’s nothing I would do if I didn’t actually want to speak whatever language I’m learning, but it can be entertaining, and most of all, very satisfying. Benny’s posted often enough about various aspects of language-learning he’s enjoyed. Like many bloggers, I think he tends to choose catchy post-titles that sound like they mean one thing but actually, when you read the post, mean something else (that isn’t nearly as controversial).

Hey Wendy.

I get what you’re saying about Benny using a post title that sounds controversial but really isn’t, and you’re right that lots of bloggers do that, but I think in this instance he means what he says about not liking the learning process.

Frankly, it doesn’t bother me that a person feels that way and all I’m doing is sharing my opinion and saying that I think it’s really important for people to enjoy every step, rather than think of it as some annoying obstacle.

I’m really not a perfectionist and I never talk about boring ‘nuts and bolts’ stuff on here. If I come across that way and bore people then I hope they tell me because I want others to enjoy what I write.